Posted on April 14, 2011 by Frank Brogni, ACC, CPC

A few years ago a rather quirky, low budget movie called “Napoleon Dynamite” came on the scene.  The film featured a somewhat backward carrot topped teen, his unusual family, and several of his colorful friends living some hilarious experiences.

One of the segments focused on Napoleon’s friend, Pedro, as he campaigned for Student Body President against the most popular girl in school, named Summer.

During their closing speeches, Summer promised that if she were elected, she would provide new cheerleader uniforms for the entire team, two new soda machines in the cafeteria, and if you voted for her, “it will be Summer all year long.”

Pedro, who was very poor, but not to be outdone, promised that if you voted for him, “your wildest dreams will come true” Needless to say, with Napoleon’s extraordinary help, Pedro won by a landslide.

This example of a political promise is not too far afield from most promises made by many of those who seek public office.  As most of us know, what is promised and what is delivered usually leaves something to be desired.

What has happened to those days when a person’s word was their bond?  Those days when you could take someone’s word to the bank???

Many people in society today have become desensitized to people’s tendency to ignore broken agreements; but, to the literal mind of a child, broken promises can cause profound hurt, disillusionment, and disappointment when their expectations are not met, even the smallest ones.  I can also guarantee you that modeling that behavior will teach them something they’ll remember.

So these illustrations beg the question, is there any difference between a promise, a contract, an agreement, a vow, or a pledge?  The answer is a resounding NO!  They are essentially all the same; but to some they carry different values.  Each is a pledge to complete a task or deliver a result that you make to yourself or another person.  All are counting on your ability to deliver what you promised; however, too many people feel that it is okay to break a small promise and only honor those agreements that carry consequences with them.  What’s the difference?   In either case, to break an agreement always creates disharmony on every level.  You will face the consequences whether the incident occurs in business or personal life.  Look at the divorce rate holding steady at 47% since WWII and that will tell you how serious people take their vows.

In many quarters of our society the measure of a person’s character is still revealed by their willingness to stand by their agreements.  Is your word really your bond?

Look for the next article about how to set up agreements that work from Frank Brogni, ACC, CPC, family relations coach and co-founder of World Class Parenting, where we believe that from the boardroom to the bedroom, from the lunch table to the kitchen table, it’s all the same