Posted on September 7, 2010 by Jennifer Yount

Is your work-life balance out of balance? Do you have a work list and a life list? Which list is winning the time war? Have you lost your life list?

I have spent years studying and focusing on aiding others with improving their work-life balance. Because of this, one would think, I would be in balance. Let me say, I am more balanced then I have been before, yet far from in balance. I reflect on this irony frequently and have many thoughts about it. To be frank, I am unsure in today’s society if there can ever be an equal balance between work and life.

Because of this and as a coach, I focus less on getting work and life in balance and more on getting life closer in balance with work. So what does this mean? I believe it is rare when work and life are equally balanced in someone’s life. I believe most of us find our scales way out of balance with work weighing very heavy. I also believe when so much time is spent discussing work-life balance we “mere mortals” realize we can’t achieve it, so we give up and don’t even try to close the gap.

I was raised in a family by depression era parents with a high work ethic. My parents worked long days, sometimes worked weekends, and missed basketball games and recitals. My brother and I were loved and never wanted for anything. This may sound familiar to you.

As adults we have the same choices to make. First and foremost, we need to have value-centered goals in our lives. Through coaching, I have found most of my clients don’t make goals or even know how to make a goal. They make task lists or objectives, but not goals. So what is a goal? A goal is a specific, measurable accomplishment to be achieved within a specific time frame. If your goal doesn’t meet these three criteria, then you will not be successful in achieving it. A value-centered goal is one furthering our individual values and beliefs and not those of others or society. Clarity on your values and beliefs is paramount to setting and achieving your goals. The goal has to be something that is fulfilling and rewarding to you, not others, or you won’t likely achieve it.

When setting goals, I believe one statement by David Kelly needs to be kept in the fore front of your mind – “fail faster to succeed sooner.” I believe powerful learning comes from failing. However, I don’t believe in failure. I believe if you are failing, then you are learning and moving forward and success will come. Every step and misstep moves you closer to achieving your goal.

In order to be successful in achieving your goals and creating a better work and life balance, here are six LIFE SAVING TIPS –

• Align your goal with your values. Why do you have this goal in the first place? Why is this goal important to you? What does success look like for you? Are you achieving this goal to honor your values or someone else’s values?
• Acknowledge and accept a whole-life perspective. This means acceptance of the fact that your work life is dependent on all of the other areas of your life. Begin thinking of your life from a whole-life perspective. What are the primary areas of your life? Work, health and well-being; family; friends; spirituality; and fun and recreation. What else?
• Integrate your goals into one list. Most of us have a work list and a life list. Additionally, our work list is already 24 hours a day, seven days a week long. Unfortunately, we also often sacrifice our life list of goals. Integrate your list of goals. Design a list to include all of the areas of your whole life and your values.
• Define your “Chocolates”. What is your reward for meeting your goals? Yes, accomplishing a goal may be enough, but isn’t fun to get a special reward for meeting or exceeding your goal. Think of it like an end of year bonus for a job well done.
• Regularly review your progress. Review your goals weekly and calendar the activities and tasks which will bring you closer to your goals. Once you know what success looks like, monitor and measure your success along the way? Own your goal and your results!
• Find an accountability partner. Success will be much easier if you have a partner along the way. This may be someone with the same goal as you, say weight loss or running a marathon. Or it may be a loved one or a coach. This is someone who will hold your dream and values with you and celebrate your steps and missteps along the way.

Take a hold of this life preserver and begin today creating more life for yourself.