The Danger of Living By Committee

Posted on January 22, 2013 by Cherese Jackson, One of Thousands of Leadership Coaches on Noomii.

One of the rarest things to find in our world today is a person courageous enough to have an independent thought. You know, someone who is so in tune with their own authenticity that they are willing to retain freedom by thinking for themselves. The very thing we worship as a society with innovators, inventors and progressive development, we fear for our own selves. It’s the concept we love to hate. On one hand, we fantasize about being this great person with major influences but on the other hand we refuse to go through the process of life to become that very person. It’s the ultimate paradox.

Since independent thinking is at an all time low, we are left with a community so hungry for significance they would put their lives in the hands of others. This may sound far fetched, but consider how we behave on social media. We put every detail of our lives into the public eye via Facebook and Twitter, asking everything from what we should eat to how we should respond to a private relationship matter. What this means is, we are so disconnected from real life relationships we would put our destiny into the hands of comments and directives from strangers. I am aware that on such sites we refer to them as ‘friends’ but we have not established a true connection. We retreat back into our online persona and live based on public opinion.

By definition, a committee is a group of people officially delegated to perform a function, such as investigating, considering, reporting, or acting on a matter. All things considered, our lives are far too important to delegate our destiny to a group or committee. But the reality is, many find this tactic easier to live with. Without the ‘committee’s’ vote or say, we are left to be responsible for our own actions.

I want to share a few ways we can take back control of our own lives:

• Re-evaluate what you share on social media: It has been said that the last frontier of privacy are the thoughts we decide to say aloud. Most of the people who have conflict have it because they chose to offer Too Much Information online. You are free to vent and say whatever you like, but you also will live with the consequences of those words. When you are angry, it is best to shut down the computer and seek the counsel of a real life person.

• Remember the easiest person to sway is the one with no plans: When you have no idea of your own purpose you are at the greatest risk to be led astray. I don’t know about you, but I would rather remain still, than make a bunch of moves based on other people’s input. At the end of the day, if I am going to blow it, I want it to be on my own terms.

• Do less talking and more doing: There is a fevered pitch of white noise all around. 24 hour news stations, instant online access and information around the globe in seconds. The new normal is to just say everything we wish for and little of what we are working for. So many are living a false sense of success via their social feeds. It’s easy to allow the noise to drown out reality and make us hide. But fight the temptation to gather supporters and as Nike says, just do it!

There will come times in life where having a close circle of friends to bounce ideas off will be invaluable. The problem arises when your committee mentality becomes your norm. I personally have utilized the experiences of others to help guide a decision, but I have seen how it can easily get out of hand. You never want to become paralyzed from moving because you are waiting for directions from another. Ultimately, you will have to be accountable for the life you create.

Cherese Jackson